Rating: - Superman saves the dumb girl!!! . . .And the World.
To me Superman is the quintessential superhero. Buff, wholesome, bright and dull. He fights for good and exists without any inner conflict, no time for any of that when there is a world to save. Those well meaning but shrug inducing qualities carry over to this film which wants to be everything (comic book, romance, disaster flick) to everybody (nerds and non-nerds), and while it has endured all these years it did not win me over. Everything starts off well enough as the first hour is almost entirely Superman back story. And it is pretty rich back story considering that before he could even walk he was involved with political treason, exploding planets, paternal sacrifice, and a trip across multiple galaxies. All this exposition does dull the storytelling a little but I wish that all franchise movies were this disciplined. What sank the movie for me was where it went from there; Superman as an adult fighting all the evil he could. Instead of an actual plot with twists and turns, we get an extended montage. Superman saves the day. Superman catches a thief. Lex Luthor causes some evil doin'. Superman stops him. There is far more energy spent pandering to the crowd than there is on making any of this plausible.

A very basic outline has Lex Luthor, in one of the most ambitious plots in history, planning to blow off the western edge of California so as to make his own property value go up (better plan than just trying to keep the undesirables out, yes?). Superman, meanwhile, spends a lot of time hanging around Lois Lane. She is the perfect match for him as she is always on the verge of certain death thanks to her inability to use her head. He saves her, she falls in love, girlfriends in the audience are no longer mad that they came. Lois Lane is so stupid in fact that she doesn't notice that her co-worker Clark Kent is actually Superman only plus glasses and minus that hideous outfit. Eventually Lex Luthor shoots a missile into the San Andreas Fault so as to put his plan in motion. Superman, ever the hero, then drills himself into the fault and fixes it. . .by hand! And at that point the film had lost both its connection to reality and me.

I do think our obsession with the Superman myth does expose us to be some pretty funny people. We flock to these films to watch the impossible happen, like being able to save the pretty girl and have her fall in love. And to remind ourselves that if the girl could just look a little deeper, past the glasses, that she would find something truly super. I did find it odd that Superman openly states that he is fighting for the American way (um... Corporate Greed? Imperialism?). You could argue that his skills might be better put to use in Somalia as opposed to constantly rescuing a girl he fancies. . . but I guess Somalia is on its own. So despite the restrained first hour and the great set design for Lex Luthor's lair (an abandoned wing of Grand Central Station) I recommend you stay away from this. It is bloated and may cause severe eye rolling. Then again, from a historical perspective, this is the film that opened up the flood gates for the dozens (and dozens!) of other comic book movies that followed. So if you want to see the cause of "Catwoman" give this one a little look see. **3/4

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